传承宝典——财富对家族关系的影响：期望管理（下）
传承宝典｜财富对家族关系的影响：期望管理（下） 导语 每个家族在养育子女时都会面临各种挑战，而大量财富的存在又会使这些挑战变得更加复杂。财富可以带来巨大优势，让我们在人生中获得各种机会，但有时也会对个人发展、家庭关系，甚至整个家族产生破坏性影响。 对财富对家族关系的影响进行深思熟虑，并进行期望管理至关重要：这包括在家族成员的职业期望、传承期望、家族领导人期望等方面建立结构合理、正式的沟通机制，同时制定家族宪章，以传达清晰一致的信息，建立家族成员共识。 本文内容由雷梭勒家族办公室根据Stonehage Fleming文章编译整理，版权归原作者所有。 职业期望 有些人很幸运，在很小的时候就确定了自己的"使命"，但对于其他人来说，选择职业或开始职业生涯的过程并不总是那么容易。 既要鼓励孩子做对他们的人生有用的事情，又要避免给他们留下应该从事什么职业的刻板印象，这两者之间存在着微妙的界限。如今，大多数人都认为，每个人都应该自由发展自己的兴趣爱好，追求自己的人生理想。 但与此同时，如果下一代中没有人站出来担任家族领导角色，父母就难免表现焦虑和担忧。这种失望感必然会对个人产生影响。同样，成功的父母可能会发现，他们很难掩饰对缺乏技能或目标感的子女的失望。 孩子应对这些压力的能力各不相同，但值得考虑的是如何以最佳方式减轻这些压力，以及哪些支持可能会有所帮助；这同样归结于有效的沟通。每个孩子都需要一个平台或论坛来表达自己的观点和想法，而不必担心或感到尴尬。家长需要得到反馈，以确保他们在沟通时考虑周全、谨慎，并有机会发现和纠正错误的理解。 在某些情况下，一个即将成年的孩子可能会受益于家族以外的导师，这个导师既得到了孩子的认同，又在父母面前具有威信，可以成为两者之间的桥梁。理想情况下，导师可以是教父教母、家族的朋友，甚至是专业顾问。 传承期望 家族处理财富传承的方式多种多样，从长子继承到所有子女平分财富，不一而足。有些人更愿意将大部分财富分配给慈善事业。 各种选择不胜枚举，无法在此一一探讨，但可以说有两个常见的错误需要避免： 1.避免令人不愉快的意外，尽量确保每个人都了解自己与兄弟姐妹和其他人的继承内容、继承方式和继承原因。在出现不平等甚至不公平的情况下，如果大家都能很好地理解其中的道理，就能更好地处理。 2.避免遗产成为父母、子女、兄弟姐妹甚至表兄弟姐妹之间关系的杠杆。没有什么比五十多岁的“子女”争夺父母的宠爱或为遗产争吵不休对家族的伤害更大的了。 家族领导人 许多家族仍然依赖长子继承制的传统，但这种情况现在正在迅速改变。长子继承制的一个优势，或许也是唯一的优势在于，它基于数百年的传统带来了一定程度的确定性。如果不通过这种方式，则下一代领导人要么是凭实力，要么是凭父母或大家族的偏爱，以秘密的或公开辩论的方式进行选拔。 就家族活力而言，有一个敏感问题是，对潜在领导人的判断不可避免地带有主观性，很难与爱护和偏袒区分开来。家族成员最好能预见到这类问题，并尽早做好应对准备，因为任何争斗与不和都可能具有极大的破坏性。 从目前的情况来看，大多数家族并没有一个正式和公开的领导者遴选程序，但有朝此方向发展的趋势，而且家族有时会让受人尊敬和公正无私的外部人士参与进来，从而让这个程序更为有效。 家族宪章的重要性 家族宪章的存在有助于平稳交接，以及新领导的遴选。经验表明，只要按照商定的框架作出决策，家族的活力和财富就更有可能代代相传。 家族宪章使家族能够围绕家族财富的总体目标和用途制定指导方针和规范指引，这有助于家族因为共同目标和共识而团结一致。 它还应确保在决策制定过程中，家族成员、受托人、顾问和家族成员选定的其他参与者都能在充分知情的情况下进行讨论，并提出有力的质疑。 结论 毫无疑问，财富既有促进作用，也有潜在的破坏力，这在很大程度上取决于如何处理各种关系。可能最好的办法是对财富对家族的影响进行深思熟虑，然后采取行动；需要让家族成员各方都对家族财富的用途达成一致，并且清楚自己的角色、权利和责任。 由此我们不难看到，虽然财富可以带来许多好处，但它也给本已要求很高的父母角色增添了复杂性。期望管理在避开最明显的陷阱方面起着至关重要的作用，但这并非易事。 沟通的形式多种多样，信息的接受者可以有各种诠释，因此，最大限度地减少误解至关重要，因为误解对个人和整个家族都会造成极大的伤害。重要的不是说了什么，而是听到了什么！ 没有人愿意像经营企业一样经营家族，但现在很多家族都认识到了结构更合理、更正式的沟通的好处，它可以传递清晰一致的信息、建立共识，让每个人都有机会在不必担心或尴尬的情况下各抒己见。 Original English Text The impact of wealth on family relationships: managing expectation (part 2) CAREER EXPECTATIONS Some people are lucky enough to identify their ‘calling’ at an early age, but for others the process of choosing a career, or how to get started, is not always easy. There is a fine line between encouraging a child to do something useful with their life, versus giving them too strong an impression of what that career should be. Most people would nowadays accept that everyone should feel free to develop their own interests and pursue their own calling in life. At the same time, however, it is difficult to avoid communicating anxiety and concern if no-one in the next generation is stepping up into family leadership roles. Such sense of disappointment is bound to impact on individuals. Equally, successful parents may find it hard to hide their disappointment with children who lack their skills or sense of purpose. The ability of the child to handle these pressures will vary, but it is worth considering how best they might be reduced and what support might be helpful; this again comes down to effective communication. Each child needs the platform or forum to express their own views and concerns without fear or embarrassment. The parents need the feedback to ensure they communicate thoughtfully and sensitively and have the opportunity to detect and correct mistaken interpretations. In some cases, a child approaching adulthood may well benefit from a mentor outside the family, who relates to the child, but also carries credibility with the parents and can be a useful bridge between the two. Ideally this might be a godparent, a family friend or even professional adviser. INHERITANCE EXPECTATIONS Families handle the passing on of wealth in a variety of different ways, ranging from primogeniture to splitting the wealth equally between all the children. Some prefer the bulk of their wealth to be allocated to charitable causes. The variety of options is too numerous to explore here, but there are arguably two common mistakes to be avoided: 1.Avoid unpleasant surprises and try to ensure everyone has some understanding of what, how and why they inherited, in relation to their siblings and others. Where there is inequality or even unfairness, it can be better handled if the rationale is well understood by all. 2.Avoid the inheritance becoming a lever in relationships between parents, children, siblings and even cousins. There are few things more damaging to a family than ‘children’, perhaps in their fifties, competing for their parents’ favour or squabbling over the inheritance. FAMILY LEADERSHIP Many families still rely on the tradition of primogeniture, but this is now changing quite rapidly. The one, and perhaps only, advantage of primogeniture is that it brings a degree of certainty based on centuries of tradition. Otherwise the next generation of leaders is selected either on merit or by favouritism, either by the parents or by the wider family, either clandestinely or with an open debate. The sensitive issue here, as far as family dynamics are concerned, is that judgments on potential leaders are inevitably subjective and are difficult to separate from love and favouritism. Families will be wise to anticipate such problems and prepare to deal with them sooner rather than later, as any rivalry can be very destructive. As things currently stand, most families do not have a formal and open process for selecting leaders, but the trend is in that direction and the process is sometimes enhanced by involving respected and impartial outsiders. THE IMPORTANCE OF CODIFICATION The existence of a family constitution can assist the smooth transition, including the selection of new leadership. Experience has shown that where decisions are taken in accordance with an agreed framework, the family dynamic and the wealth are a lot more likely to survive for future generations. A family constitution enables the family to set out guidelines and parameters for the broad purpose and use of the family wealth, which helps the family unite behind some common objectives and with a common understanding. It should also ensure that decision making is subject to a properly informed debate and robust challenge, both from family members and from trustees, advisers and others whom the family selects to be involved. CONCLUSION There is no doubt that wealth has both an enabling and potentially destructive power, depending significantly on how relationships are managed. Having a considered approach to the impact of wealth on the family is probably the best way forward; the purpose of the family’s wealth is agreed upon and all parties are aware of their roles, rights and responsibilities. The inevitable conclusion is that whilst wealth brings many benefits, it adds complexity to the already demanding role of being a parent. The management of expectations plays a critical role in avoiding the most obvious pitfalls, but this is no easy task. Communication takes many forms and is open to interpretation in the hands of the receiver, so it is vital to minimise the room for misunderstandings to arise, which can be so damaging both to individuals and to the family as a whole. It is not what is said that matters, but what is heard! No one wants to run a family like a business, but many families now recognise the advantages of better structured, more formal communication, to put across clear and consistent messages, to build a common understanding and to give everyone the opportunity to air their differences without fear or embarrassment. 本文转载自瑞士雷梭勒家族办公室，如有侵权，敬请告知删除。 Sooswiss为您提供 瑞士方向私人管家式的定制服务： 1）家族传承 2）财富管理 3）投资咨询 4）企业服务 5）居留计划 6）国际教育 更多资讯请登录网站 www.sooswiss.com
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